Asking for help doesn’t come without risk, and voicing questions holds opportunities for ridicule. But sometimes the risk is worth the ride and the questions unfold into glorious answers. However, before I give voice to my question, I jump through mental hoops like these:

 

“Shouldn’t I know this?”

 

“What if I come across ignorant?”

 

“That’s a stupid request.”

 

“I don’t know how to ask this without offending anyone.”

 

I keep telling myself and my kids that there isn’t a dumb question because asking questions is a sign of someone who’s hungry for knowledge and information. It’s when those questions reveal that I need something from someone–whether it’s someone’s help or their acknowledgement or advice– that I feel like I’m a major inconvenience. Too often, I turn to Google or Alexa because they’re less intimidating. My racing heart stills and the idea cements that I need to figure things out on my own.

 

In our self-sufficiency driven culture, the pressure to know all the things or at least perceive to know all the things creates a pride that prevents us from asking. On the flipside, insecurity whispers that we’d just better figure this life out on our own because we’re really not that important. Pride and insecurity drive us away from the One who receives our questions and who desires to give us good gifts.

 

If we turn to the first few chapters in Genesis, we discover the tendency of human nature towards self-sufficiency.  Two humans in a perfect relationship with God hid from God once sin entered the world. Instead of running to God they ran away from him. They turned to themselves in an attempt to solve the problem.

 

Our tendency is independence and self-sufficiency, but self-sufficiency and independence feeds the pride that prevents us from running to God in times of need. When we screw up, we want to cover up. But God asks us to uncover and run straight to him.

 

Take Up Your Courage

 

Hebrews 4:12-16 tells us that God sees all things because everything is laid bare before him. It tells us that we have a high priest who intercedes for us and makes a way for us to boldly approach the throne of God to receive the grace we need.

 

Imagine if we approached all our problems with this mentality. Envision running towards God, crying for help, pouring out our hearts to him, confessing our trust, and asking for what we want. This is the power of lament: it brings us to a place of peaceful trust because we run towards God instead of away. It gives our heart a place to dump the hidden and the visible garbage. Lament allows God to make something beautiful out of our pain.

 

We don’t need to have it all figured out before we come to God. We don’t need to be prim and proper or spit and polished. It’s in the coming to him– just as we are– where he refines us and creates beauty out of ashes.

 

Bring Your Petition

 

Using Psalm 31 as a model, we see how David brought his petition before the Lord.

 

¹⁴ But I trust in you, Lord;
    I say, “You are my God.”
¹⁵ My times are in your hands;
    deliver me from the hands of my enemies,
    from those who pursue me.
¹⁶ Let your face shine on your servant;
    save me in your unfailing love.
¹⁷ Let me not be put to shame, Lord,
    for I have cried out to you;
but let the wicked be put to shame
    and be silent in the realm of the dead.
¹⁸ Let their lying lips be silenced,
    for with pride and contempt
    they speak arrogantly against the righteous.

 

David begins the petition portion of his lament with a redeclaration of his trust in God. Then he goes on to ask for deliverance from his enemies and that God would save him. He petitions God to look toward him and not let him be put to shame.

 

Reveal Your Heart

 

These verses echo what’s so often hiding in our hearts: that God would do something about our circumstances and that his face would be turned towards us–in the big and little stuff of life. Yet, we’re often shamed into hiding our need. Shame leads us to false belief that we don’t deserve God’s help.  Fear  of disappointment holds us back from asking the question: “What do I want God to do for me today?”

 

And that’s the question I leave with you: What do you want God to do for you? Is it healing, provision, intercession, advocacy, trust, peace, or strength? Take your pain, tell God everything, redeclare your trust in him, and ask. Take courage and be bold.

 

Learning to Lament Series

When Pain Overtakes Joy and What to Do About It

Cry For Victory and Find Your Way Home

The Song of Lament and The Way to Trust His Heart

When Emotions and Lament Create Paths to Trust