I have this thing about crumbs in my bed. I can always, always tell when someone has been eating in bed even when said person has swept the evidence of the crackers or peanuts or chips to the floor, I will feel it. It’s the only time in my life when I’ve felt like the Princess and the Pea. I will feel the crumb. It might be the only crumb, but it’s significant enough to keep me awake until I sweep it away.
Acceptance, Security, and Significance is the three legged stool that makes up our identity. My weakest “leg” is the one labeled significant.
I look at my little ol’ life and I see a stay at home mom who rarely gets regular showers, a crazy homeschooler who receives the stink eye way too often, a wanna be author with dreams of a book in your local bookstore. I have a kitchen sink that is never empty. I am raising dust bunnies. I have a bed that gets made fifty percent of the time. The kitchen island is used to store clutter. I look at my life and don’t see significance.
But my view is being transformed as I dive deeper into God’s idea of significance. It’s not about being noticed. It’s not having the kitchen sink empty. It’s not having a bed made with perfect corners or the blankets hanging evenly along the side (mine is quite crooked, thank-you very much). It’s not even having thousands of people read these words or buy my “some-day books”.
Significance is truly a going lower. A going smaller so God can go bigger. It’s about becoming less of me so more fruit that honors God can grow and be harvested for his purpose. It’s about realizing—deep within—that this life isn’t about how I position myself for success, but how I position myself to be used for God’s kingdom. In order to do that I must go lower and lower so he can be lifted higher and higher.
I must let go of the unspoken, yet very loud, expectations as a stay at home mom. A clean house? Perfect children? Harmonious marriage? Sometimes, but not always, and this is why my significance cannot be rooted in my role at stay at home mom.
I must release the pressure of the fishbowl that homeschooling becomes. Mid-year curriculum changes happen. Kids struggle—sometimes for days, months, or years. Choices get made, paths are chosen that disappoint me, but these don’t affect my significance.
That dream? The one that involves words on a page and my name on the spine? My significance doesn’t change whether that dream simply stays this wonderful, glow-y kind of dream. And the even more secret dream—of leading worship for a women’s conference, of leading tender hearts into the most precious presence of God? Guess what? My significance doesn’t change whether I’m leading 8 or 800.
My heart. My life. My innermost being is the most significant when placed in the tender hands of my most loving God to be shaped and molded for his purpose and position. Even when I’m feeling as though I’m not seen–as long as I stay a living, willing sacrifice– I know without a shadow of doubt that God looks at me and sees me as significant.
But it’s one thing to know this on a surface level, it’s a completely different to accept this on a heart level where it gets lived out on a daily, moment by moment level.
That’s why these final verses in the “Who I Am in Christ” mean so much and culminate the entire list and give us the clue on how to actually live out our acceptance, security, and significance.
“In whom we have boldness and access with confidence through our faith in him.” Ephesians 3:12 ESV
“I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13 ESV
It’s been well established that I cannot convince myself of my acceptance, security or significance. I cannot positive self-talk enough to break through the lies my heart struggles with. I’ve tried. The failure feeds the lies.
It’s only when I take my weakness to God that I find the strength I need to embrace the Truth of what he says about me.
Receiving our identity in Christ happens the moment we receive Christ as our Savior, but living out our identity with him takes steps of faith and trusting him to rewrite some of our thought patterns.
It’s this process that makes our lives beautiful and colorful and oh so worth the wrestling. There’s nothing more beautiful than a women— who has never felt loved or chosen— then when her eyes light with the Holy Fire of God’s truth as it sinks into her heart and rewrites what her past has taught and told her. As the profound truth penetrates her heart, the strongholds fall and God rushes in and beauty is wrought from the rubble.
That’s what makes the journey towards living out our identity worth the struggle. It’s like the metamorphosis of a butterfly. Beauty unfurls. Beauty is you.
Embrace your identity in Christ. And if you struggle, that’s okay. The struggle is part of the journey. We know Someone who can help us navigate the journey and give us the faith, strength and power to live out our identity.
I’ve created a small gift for us to help us remember our identity in Christ. I call them our “Real ID” cards. There are nine small cards covering the details of our acceptance, security, and significance, and they are for us to cut apart and place in strategic areas: home, work, vehicle, or to give away. They are available as a free download by clicking through the link in the sidebar (desktop) or at the bottom of this post (mobile). If you are reading this through your email, please link through to my website and you’ll find it there.
Thank-you for journeying with me through this series.
I hope your heart has been changed for the better.